My Bubbles, my angel. My little girl passed away on, May 3, 2020. During this horrible pandemic, many people loved you so very much, so many were unable to meet you or say goodbye. I know we only spent such a short amount of time together, but I cherished every moment that was given. Raelynn, you were the little girl I always wanted. You taught me how to love harder and have more patience.
Your smiles have been stuck in my head. If I could change every moment that led to this, believe me I would. Everyday I regret that Saturday, when we fell. I replay every scenario in my head in what I could have done differently. So many people try to reassure me that I did everything I could. But, as your mommy I feel like there was so much more I could have or should have done. I feel lost without you here.
When you were first born, I remember the doctor laying you on my chest and I just started tearing up, I knew right then and there you were perfect. I wanted to give you the world. I know you fought so hard. When the doctors told me you were never going to be able to take your first steps or say your first words, I was heartbroken. I knew you were gone, I feel like I failed you as a mother. I had so much hope and wanted a miracle to happen. I prayed…we all prayed, just hoping this nightmare would go away.
I would do anything in this world to just hold you one last time and see that beautiful smile. It breaks my heart that your big brother couldn’t give you a kiss goodbye. He adores you, baby girl. He was so happy to be a big brother, he always wanted to hold you and help as much as he could. He keeps asking for his baby sister. Please let him know you are okay. I know you’ll be watching over him keeping Gabriel safe.
I love you, pumpkin. I miss you dearly. I want to thank you for making me your mommy. God gave me such a precious gift. Even though you are in heaven, I will always be here for you.
I laid you down every night saying close your eyes and see angels. Now, everytime I close my eyes, I see you. The most beautiful angel in the world.